27 Comments
User's avatar
Kim Greene's avatar

Fourteen drinks a week is not enough to keep a man alive. When my doctor asked me if I had more than fourteen drinks I responded of course not, thinking he meant per day. The doctor said, “Not in a day, in a week.” I was compelled to lie.

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Gary Shteyngart's avatar

I really appreciate your perspective.

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Kim Greene's avatar

I like yours too!

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Timber Fox's avatar

My favorite part of Switzerland is when you drive in and they pull you over and you have to pay €50 so you know what the visit is going to be like. You want to see our alps? They ain't free, buddy.

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Adrian's avatar

They do not pull you over for no reason. Low level officials or policeman do not take bribes or stop foreigners to pay made up fines with no receipt.

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Timber Fox's avatar

You need to buy a sticker to drive on their roads. That's what I was referring to.

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Adrian's avatar

No. Only for the highways. An that‘s 100 Francs. Valid for 1 year. Less than I paid on road tolls in Italy or USA

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Timber Fox's avatar

Thank you for validating my statement. It's been a pleasure.

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Marlena Spieler's avatar

Taytos. Arent they the BEST!

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Gary Shteyngart's avatar

Mind blown.

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Run Freedom Run's avatar

You should visit the Islets of Langerhans and love them. I, who do not know you personally, believe that you can do all that you do and give all the love and wit without being so unkind to those little islands. You can do it but very few who have crossed over that much talked about line can do so on their own

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the #watchnerd's avatar

SolarBeat. The watch with a SoundCloud. Probably

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Peter's avatar

And Anthony Bourdain's favorite:

Restaurant Ox & Klee Köln

+49 163 8528455

https://maps.app.goo.gl/3qRtwYD5iz6c7u5s5

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Peter's avatar

And then Cologne! Here is an excellent primer:

https://youtu.be/3bXPiVlWcHY

You will enjoy the Chocolate Museum!

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Gary Shteyngart's avatar

wish i could stay longer

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Beth's avatar

Gary, have you tried any of the new pretend alcohols? I am trying to cut back myself, so last night I had one of those hop sodas at my usual drinking hour and was surprised to find it slightly satisfying. --P.S. Love your work; that last sentence of "Botched Circumcision" will stay with me for a long, long time.

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Gary Shteyngart's avatar

I don't have enough imagination to pretend it has alcohol.

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Jackie Julty's avatar

Augh! You are full of puns in this post, and I'm howling with laughter over it. It makes readers feel as though they're on your trip with you. Regarding your watch, do some wild color as that a plain watch band won't do it justice.Enjoy the rest of your trip and have safe travels.

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Gary Shteyngart's avatar

Am getting truly crazy watch band. Thanks.

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Mosy48's avatar

Hilarious and wonderful.

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Gary Shteyngart's avatar

Thanks!

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Patti Meredith's avatar

I really love the watch!

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Felix's avatar

The Solar Beat is fantastic!

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Gary Shteyngart's avatar

It's a thing of beauty.

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Felix's avatar

Any chance of you doing a reading in Vienna?

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User's avatar
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Jun 24, 2022
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Gary Shteyngart's avatar

It was a deeply funny question on one level.

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User's avatar
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Jun 22, 2022
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Gary Shteyngart's avatar

Applying for asylum now.

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